It's Nobody's Fault

The Mom and I have been arguing more than we like these days.

And as much as I hate to admit it, tensions can be pretty high around here. It’s awful.

Things have been ramping up as The Boy moves closer to teenagerhood. He’s getting moodier, which apparently has little to do with CP. But what CP does bring into the equation is fewer emotional filters. While The Teengirl at this age could keep things together enough to stomp around and roll her eyes, The Boy launches into a full-out tantrum when he gets frustrated.

And his frustration levels, ironically enough, are rising as he masters more skills.

The Boy is starting to see what is possible for him, and getting frustrated when he can’t reach his goals. (“frustrated” is code for screaming and crying without stop).

All this really wears The Mom and me down. And then you add in my sense of guilt over not doing his physical therapy exercises often enough. And his vision exercises. And taking him to the pool. And all the other ways I fall short as a Dad and as the lead caregiver.

So tempers fly. And The Mom and I argue over stupid stuff.

And it hurts. A lot.

Thank God we’ve got other people in our lives, who can speak wisdom into our situation.

My good friend and Costco lunch partner let me blow off steam for a while and then spoke Godly counsel. He said,

“You are both in a really tough situation. It’s just hard. And you’re looking for someone to blame for how hard it is. So you argue. 

“But the thing is, neither of you is to blame for The Boy’s situation. It’s nobody’s fault.”

Truth.

It’s nobody’s fault.

But it’s still hard. Very hard.

Through the Roof

A Blog Supported by the Mosaic ministry of Third Church, ECO

"Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. 4 Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on." (Mark 2:3-4)

About: This is a blog about accessibility, intimacy, and community. About being welcome.  It’s also about bringing up The Boy. He's 11 years old and has cerebral palsy. Also popping up are The TeenGirl, who just turned 13, and The Mom, who is awesome. It's written by The Dad. It's my words, my view. Other people will think differently and have different opinions. Good.